Into The Abyss

If you haven't been able to tell yet (or perhaps this is the first time you have read my blog) I love the outdoors and spending time camping, hiking and exploring the vast wildernesses available to me in Southern Alberta have been one of my favourite pass times since..... well as long as I can remember! spending time with friends and family in the mountains has always been a staple activity in my life! some of these mountaineering experiences have been from scout camps!

I remember one scout camp in particular, we started preparing months before and to plan and prepare for the trip! why so long before? we were going to do something we had never done before (I will leave you in the dark for now (that joke will be funnier later on I promise!)) there were skills we had to learn and procedures we had to memorize to ensure our safety! Yes our Scout leaders took us spelunking (Dry Caving)

to prepare for this trip we had to learn specific knots that we would use for specific repels that we would absolutely need and other knots we needed to learn to know how to climb back out in case of emergency that we hoped we would not need! we had to learn other skills and practice them so that they could be used when in the depths of the caves! skills such as repelling, climbing, "squeezing", Scrambling, orienting withing the cave walls! without these skills we would not have been able to get out! we also had to learn how to care for our head lights and change a battery in the dark! each of these skills absolutely individual and important! with all  but one of them we would not have been fully prepared! We practiced these skills during our weekly activity night for months until finally we were prepared and the time came for the camp out!

We packed all our gear and met early in the morning at the church! drove for about 2 hours to the Crowsnest Pass where the trail head was! we hiked up to our base camp and set up camp for the night! the next day we arose bright and early again to enter the cave for the day! another good assent! then we entered the cave! it was fun to walk into the mouth of this cave! it seemed huge! then we left the reach of the day light and found ourselves in a whole different world! stalagmites and stalactites, soda straws and the sound of water with no other evidence thereof! the only light available was our headlamps! it was incredible! eventually we were brought to the first repel sight! a 60 meter decent (if I remember correct) straight down into absolute blackness! here is where we were put to the test! did we know our knots and did we trust ourselves enough to trust the knots we tied! under close supervision provided by our scout master we tied our knots and went over the edge in the abyss! what a thrill! the rush and feeling of repelling into the darkness was indescribable! one by one we all went down (some of the other boys weren't such a fan of the feeling of free falling into the darkness as evidenced by their screaming) and all made it down safely! we continued on scrambling over this passage, squeezing through that gap, climbing over that wall and repelling further and further down! I very much enjoyed the trip, after all I was prepared! however once we got out of the cave (another tight squeeze that took us right through a glacial waterfall!) I overhead some of the other boys complain about how hard it was and how much they didn't like this trip! (I can only assume because they were not prepared)


How much like life here on earth this experience was! we must prepare for it! learn procedures and practice knots! some we will need for sure and others we hope never to use! as we study out the procedures from practice the knots and seek the guidance of our leaders we will be ready for all the challenges that come! challenges will come, that is a fact of life, but we need not face them unprepared! their are experts to listen to, guide books to read and personal experiences to be had! (I think you are smart enough to make unspoken connections to what these things represent!) and when we come out sure we will have little cuts and bruises, perhaps we hit our head a couple times, and maybe we got drenched by the icy waters near the end, however all these things have given us experience and have been for our benefit! I am grateful for my experience in the abyss, it helped me learn to better appreciate the good things in life, but more importantly taught me that the hard things are good things too!

WMI? BE PREPARED! ( IT MAKES THINGS EASIER!)

The Edge

I loved going out and hanging out with my friends! it was a lot of fun for me! We would stay out and play basketball, watch movies, play games or just sit and talk until the wee (or sometimes not so wee) hours of the morning! it was a lot of fun except the fact that they all lived on the other side of town, and I would have to drive to their places for all the fun and festivities! I remember one day (if I remember correct it was a Monday in march (it will be significant latter on I promise)) we were watching basketball and playing games! we continued playing board games, card games, party games! we got really good at  group charades and taboo! not to brag or nothing but the team I was on seemed to be the winning team every time..... coincidence? maybe.... well we continued to have fun as it got later and later! it always seemed to work without fail that every one would decide we would watch one last movie/or episode of a favourite TV show and break after that! and so we did! well when I left my T-shirt and shorts were welcomed outside with a fresh blanket of snow! why was I in a T-shirt and shorts the day had been a nice warm day so I was dressed for that! well I got into my car (actually not my car at all but my parents mini van... but you know close enough) and started to drive off, creating fresh new paths in a blanket of snow (one of my favourite things to do!)

Perhaps this diagram will help!

(stay with me here this next part will be hard to explain!) well what happens when new snow lands on warm pavement..... it melts! (here is where the march part becomes relevant) what happens when melted snow (AKA water) gets cold with more snow on top.... well we call that Ice! so recap, we have the street with a layer of ice on it with a layer of new snow on top of that..... for those of you who don't know what that means I will tell you! that means the roads are s slippery mess! you can't go to slow.... or you get stuck.... but if you go to fast.... you end up in the ditch! (are we all on the same page right now, pretty much i am driving a death machine down an rigged road!) (just wait it gets better) to get home from this particular fiends home I leave the community and take a left turn onto the highway! (keep waiting it gets better) this particular stretch of the highway spanned a coulee (or a really deep ravine)! which would have been okay but it was also under construction so the heavy duty guard rails..... were taken down! (okay another recap death machine, slippery roads, sketchy left turn, and a doom drop sound like fun yet?) well as I was making this turn I started to drift sideways towards this ravine (just so my mother is aware I should mention that No, I was not speeding and Yes I was obeying all traffic laws) I kept on slipping and the thought "this is the end, I am going over the edge and going to die.... this can't be the end! I have so much to do" and yet it seemed to be the end! this all happened in a about 10 seconds of time but seemed to be an eternity! I am not going to say my life flashed before my eyes (that would be a lie) but I will say that I was legitimately concerned about going over the edge into the snow chasm beneath and being there until someone found my dead (or mangled) body the next day! I remember having that panic in my mind until another thought entered "well, I guess now is as good a time as any!" the thought was had for just a few moments and my car (my parents mini van) caught traction and I drove away safely!

the rest of the ride home I reflected on the peace that tangibly entered the car and my body when I caught hold of that thought! It was as real as could possibly be! literally a feeling of love and care! I reflected as to why the thought, "I guess now is as good a time as any" could bring such peace! I was stopped at a red light when it clicked (as I remember the light turned green at the same instant it clicked... so it was my little light bulb moment...... it was pretty cool) the conclusion I came to was that it was faith that overcame fear!(2 Timothy 1:7) I knew I was not perfect but I was certainly doing my part to become better, I believed in the atonement of Christ and knew that as I rely on Christ and did his will all would be right in the end! and so my fear was rectified by faith in Jesus Christ! and that is the way it must be! Faith in Jesus Christ is the antidote for all fear! it is as simple as that! our acting on our beliefs in him is what will bring us peace! my relief came not just from knowing there isn't really a convenient time to die but also because the thought itself was acting on my belief in Gods Promises! Faith by nature is manifest in some sort of an action and in performing that action, whether it is large or small, is what brings the Saviours peace (John 14:27) into our lives! I know that as our faith replaces our fears we become mightier men (and women....the alliteration was better with men...not my fault blame the English language)

WMI? LET YOUR FAITH OVERCOME YOUR FEARS!

Mother Dearest

My mother is amazing, she truly is the most wonderful person on the face of this planet! she always has a smile on her face and a loving word to share! I suppose that is why she could always convince me to do the things I didn't always want to! clean my room, vacuum the basement, or go to the garden! I don't know how she did but with out guilt tripping me she would guilt trip me into doing these things.... yeah make sense of that one! if any of you know how she did it... please notify me, I have yet to figure it out! the worst was the Gardening! I was
all in for the playing in the dirt at the beginning, turning over the soil, planting and building the wind shelters (hurricane force winds are not uncommon where I am from) the squishing off bugs and the harvesting of food (I LOVE FOOD)  but when it came to the constant watering and weeding and all the in between stuff I was less than enthusiastic! In the long run though she ended up winning the battles of will and looking back I learned some of the most valuable lessons in life from the experiences I had in the Garden with her!

Each year we would wait for the snow to melt and the ground to thaw, we would go to our garden plots and dig up and turn over the earth, then add in peat moss, manure, top soil and fertilizer (all organic.... you know healthy kind of way) then we would make out the plan of what was going where this year! How many potato hills we needed, where should the beans go, Do we need more zucchini pants this year (The answer is no, NO you do NOT need any more zucchini!) where are the flowers going to be planted (yes flowers in a vegetable garden.... they attract pollinators) ect ect! with all that planned out we would begin to make rows, and hills, and wind tents! it was quite a production to have 6-7 kids running around trying to help plant a garden..... somehow my parents managed with out any major heart problems for many years (I would like to know their secret) eventually we would have potato hills made in neat little rows, tomato tents up, cucumbers in little milk jugs and beans and peas with trellises to grow on..... it was a pretty good looking garden!

After all that came the hard work.... the daily watering (twice daily sometimes) the weekly weeding (actually it was more than weekly but I liked the sound of the alliteration) the care needed for each plant, miracle grow ect ect! Almost every day of every week my mother called me out of the basement to go to the garden and work! often time she had to call me several times before I would put down what ever I may have been doing! (sometimes she would even have to come down the stairs...those were never the fun times) eventually I was convinced (or compelled) to come and work in the garden! hoeing out the weeds, watering individual cucumber and tomato plants and (my favourite) squishing plump juicy potato bugs! (their guts will turn your entire hand orange! I can't even begin to describe they joy it brought to my heart! SO MUCH FUN!!)

after months of this daily garden up keep we finally got to eat some of the fruits of our hard work! as we needed them vegetables were available, beans, zucchini,  peas, cucumbers, carrots, more zucchini (Even though the answer was always NO NO more zucchini we always planted more than enough Zucchini) and yet the work still wasn't done! even after we started to harvest we still needed to weed, and water, and care for all the plants! so now every day of every week we went to the garden to hoe weeds, water plants, harvest veggies and other up keep! even up to covering the garden with quilts and blankets for frosts (Canada? frost? never... I have seen snow in all 12 months at some point) this would continue until the final harvest. (usually would be when we caught word of the first really bad frost!) we would stay until after dark gathering all the salvageable tomatoes, potatoes, carrots, ect ect! a mass gathering of everything possible! and yet even after the final harvest the work wasn't done! we would have to take down all growing structures, cover up the withered plants for compost and nutrient rich soil. so are we done yet? NOPE, now for the washing, the preparing, the canning, the storage ect ect of all the harvested food! and by the time all that is done we are preparing the soil for next years growing season!

What lesson did I learn from this experience, a Garden doesn't just come to us! I now understand why my mother would strongly encourage me to participate in the yearly gardening, she wanted me to know not only how to prepare soil but prepare my soul! not only how to grow food, but to grow a testimony! not only to reap the fruits of the vine, but the fruits of the True Vine! (John 15:1) there are many people in the gardening world that buy a plot of land and say they have a garden... but they only have the potential for a garden! there are many who plant and say they have a garden.... still just the potential for that garden! others will water and weed at the beginning and say they have a garden and yet still the garden is only there in potential! the same goes with our testimonies, they can only grow and produce fruits by our constant and un wavering labours to keep them healthy! the daily receiving the Living Waters (John 4:10) to constantly bring out the weeds of doubt (Matt 13:7,22) to create the correct environment to cultivate an appropriate atmosphere for the word of life to take root and grow! I am very grateful that my Mother Dearest drilled this into my mind year after year, week after week and day after day! Our work in the garden was the evidence of our faith in the bounty of the final yield! with out the daily effort there would be no long term yield!

WMI? A TESTIMONY IS GROWN ONE DAY AT A TIME!

I Can't Sing

while in my childhood I watched all my brothers play sports! Basketball season, football season, rugby season, volleyball season, ect. ect. I sat in our high school gym (and our field as the case may be) and watched them play whatever it was! naturally I thought I was going to follow, as I have mentioned heretofore I have tried my best to follow in the footsteps of my brothers! alas, I was foiled in my plan when I found a hidden (I am sure if you asked my family it wasn't very hidden) talent! I was asked to participate in Speech and Drama! (if I could sing I am sure I would have enjoyed that but because I can't sing I speak..... (pretty great talent isn't it, I can talk)) I loved my time on stage and the lessons I learned from that time! I learned a great deal about myself in my experiences in the theater! I enjoyed performing and being on stage a great deal, I found more success and joy in these experiences than I ever would have playing on a sports team! (not that don't enjoy time on the court, I still love playing a game of pickup any time) I also have been blessed to know that my family and friends found as much joy as I did watching me on stage!

any way back to the lesson that I wanted to share with you (I honestly could go on for an entire blog post about different thought and feelings I had about the stage. but we will save that for future blogs!) this particular lesson will start with a choice I had to make in high school! a choice I already mentioned in this blog! in grade ten I made the difficult choice for me to take the path of speech and drama over a path of athletics! I love both fields in a great abundance but for the sake of time I had to choose one over the other! and so I ventured down the theatrical side of my life! and how much fun it was! I loved performing Shakespeare, reciting Robert Frost, entertaining with the words of various writers! seeing people laugh, smile, gasp, and even cry while I performed brought great joy to my heart!

while most of my activity in the theater was outside and separate from my schooling  I did eventually audition for my grade 10 (or tenth grade for those of you not from Canada) high school spring play! I had memorized and practiced my monologue and felt very prepared! I got in my audition with the drama teacher and performed to the best of my ability! after answering a few other questions and providing the times I am busy and wouldn't be able to attend rehearsals I was left awaiting a response! a few days later I was sitting in math class and was called down to the main office! I remember going through my week, trying to figure out which assignment I hadn't handed in to which teacher! (if you ask my mom she will tell you that list was much to long to narrow down. and she would be right) when I arrived in the office I saw that Greg, the drama teacher was sitting waiting for me! he commended my audition and asked me about my schedule, he noted that I had marked the entire day for Sunday as unavailable, he asked if that could be adjusted as rehearsals would run on Sunday quite regular! I responded and let him know that Sunday was a special and sacred day where I will not participate in worldly activities on that day! he nodded his head and shook my hand!

I would love to be able to tell you that he respected my decision and despite this action, gave me a role in the cast! such was not the case! the next day the cast was posted in the hall and my name was no where to be found! I would also like to say that things changed in the future and I was permitted a part in later years, again this did not happen! I was a little disappointed... I had heard all these stories where minds were change by such a bold action! I remember wondering if I should have swayed my position a little in order to get a minor role! I remember wondering if I should have played basketball instead! I remained in this state of wondering for about a week, then I got a call from the leader of a local theatrical company, the tale spinners! she asked me if I could spare two hours twice a week and participate with her and the tale spinners! two hours a week on Wednesday and Friday vs. two hours a day seven days a week..... A major role in a group of seven or a minor role in a group of 40...... seemed like an obvious blessing to me that the lord was mindful of my efforts and my choices! (also it should be noted that I enjoyed the script better anyway.... and the members of the cast as well!)

It was reaffirmed to me in this experience that the lord truly does provide a way for us to fulfill his commandments (1st Nephi 3:7) The Sabbath day is a Holy day and there are blessings in keeping it scared! The Lord loves His children and is mindful of their needs and even desires! He wants us to have joy in this life, and will honour our righteous requests as He sees fit! I know that He has been watching over me, and that as I live faithful to Him he will bless me beyond my ability to comprehend!

WMI? Righteous Obedience Opens the Wondows of Heaven!

My First Date

in the past I have heard that I tell stories of my brother, the mountains, and sports to much and it seems like those are all that is in my life! well surprisingly I do have sisters and I love them very much, they have played a very large roll in who I am today! (I sometimes don't give them enough credit) this is one of the lessons my sister Mandy taught me when I was very young!

as a young kid I hadn't learned to be grateful for what I did have yet and often times had a lot of self pity (looking back I had a great childhood and I wouldn't trade it in for anything else) I felt like my brothers were the meanest people on the planet and that they were just out to make my life miserable (again in hindsight they put up with a lot and were AMAZING older brothers!) I felt bullied at school (I laugh at my 8 year old self now, things were really not all that bad... for some reason I built it up in my mind the world was out to get me!) in short I felt like nobody loved me and that I was all alone! (the hard life of those in elementary school)

I remember that I was spending time with Mandy in the house, what we were doing I have no idea but I remember I was having fun! For some reason or another my sister called two of my older brothers (Garth and Colin) outside to go on a drive with her! We all rushed toward our old blue car, Hefty! (it may have been the 5th ninja turtle, Lanny, (a green hatchback) the other car of my childhood, but which it was is of little consequence (I really just wanted to share with you the awesome car names I grew up with)) when we got to the car my brothers called out for shotgun. I was ready to take the back seat! Mandy stopped them and said that she was going on a date with me! I was excited mostly because I GOT TO SIT IN THE FRONT SEAT! I don't remember much about the drive, I do remember two things we listened to a mixed CD of sappy songs my sister had made up, and we went to Dairy Queen and got chocolate dipped ice cream cones! I felt so special and really loved spending time with my sister that day! from that day forth I knew she always had my back, even to this day! I knew that no matter what my sister was there for me even if I thought no one else was! I still can trust my sister and come to her if I need help with this question or that problem.

As I have grown up I have learned that I have so many people that have my back! My Sisters, my Mother, my Father, my Brothers, my nieces, my nephews, my friends, and on and on and on the list goes! my bishop, my young men leader, my mission companion, my mission president, and more and more! however above all the rest I know there is one greater than all of these that has my back! I know that Jesus Christ has got my back! He knows our individual needs and our individual situations. how does he know? because "he [has gone] forth, suffering pains and afflictions and of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people. And he [has taken] upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succor his people according to their infirmities." (Alma 7:11-12) Jesus Christ has experienced our hardships and knows how we feel! so what? well, that means there is someone to turn toward, someone who can "take you out on a date" and make lift you up! there is someone who will always be there when you need advice on this problem or that question! Christ will sit us in the front seat, give us his attention and listen to us, ALWAYS! me that makes all the difference, knowing that there is someone who knows me perfectly and can help me in the way that fits me best!

WMI? WE ARE NEVER EVER ALONE!